拉维尼奥提起陶罐往铜盆里倒了些水,然后在铜镜前坐下,打开木盒拿出剃刀。伊往脸颊上拍了些水,右手上的剃刀比在脖子边,但没有动手。在神庙服役第十二年的维斯塔贞女用湿淋淋的左手在脖子上摸索按住喉结——这依然是一个新的东西,伊每天在摸索如何穿衣服能把它挡住。拉维尼奥皱眉看着镜子,剃刀在空中画着细小的弧线,假如外科大夫能把这东西割掉该省多少事啊——那么伊会重新得到伊的声音——过去的声音吗?而克里夫斯也许还会只是克里夫斯嬷嬷而不会……
房门突然打开了,拉维尼奥像被闪电击中一样跳起来——伊以为自己锁过门了,铜盆晃了一晃,打湿了长袍下摆。“朱庇特在上!”拉维尼奥抄起手边的一块布掩住眼睛以下,转头看到自己的母亲拿着钥匙。“你不能随便打开我的门!”拉维尼奥抗议道。
“这是我的房子,我有所有的钥匙。”朱莉亚·拉维尼亚说。
“这是马提乌斯的房子。你知道,他现在是我们家的监护人。”拉维尼奥顶嘴道。
“是我的监护人,不是你的,缇利亚。而且这房子是我的,除非我要卖房子才需要他同意。”朱莉亚·拉维尼亚冷笑一声。
“这根本就是两回事!有钥匙不代表你可以随便开我房间的门。万一我在换衣服……”拉维尼奥把脸转回去面对铜镜,对着镜中母亲的影子说。
“你是我女儿。”朱莉亚·拉维尼亚陈述道,拉维尼奥哪怕去法庭作证也发不出这么坚定的声音。但她好歹走进来以后把房门关上了。
拉维尼奥摔下了手上的布,彷佛没听见对方的话,再次往脸颊上泼水,并且故意把水花弄得很大声。然后伊沉着地拿起剃刀在右颌刮了一刀。“这剃刀要磨了。”拉维尼奥大声说,好像这能引起母亲的任何注意似的。
“你哥哥给你写信了吗?”朱莉亚·拉维尼亚已经开始展开她的话题——她的房子,她的孩子们,她的话题。父亲几乎一下葬马提乌斯就抛下新寡的母亲离家参军了,至今已经半年。拉维尼奥正是因为这样才时不时请假回家住一两天——这比起神庙的生活更像是忍耐和修行。
“没有。”拉维尼奥在盆中涮了涮剃刀,又一次故意将水搅得很大声。当然,伊在说谎,伊已经接到过两三卷辗转送来的皮纸卷。马提乌斯在每一封里叮嘱伊少惹麻烦——到底是谁经常惹上麻烦啊?——以及对妈妈好点。“如果你这么在乎妈妈的话,烦请抬起你的屁股给她写封信。我要被烦死了。”拉维尼奥在某封回信里写道,并希望没有人敢拆开维斯塔贞女的私人信件看到如此不得体的语言,当然,伊的署名是字母 L,没有全名。他们最好以为这是卢西亚、卢克丽霞或者利维亚,而不是拉维尼……什么?但从马提乌斯后来的信看,拉维尼奥怀疑回信是否送到过他手上。或者他收到了信但是懒得在下一封信里做出任何答复,自我中心的混蛋,他只会写他想写的东西。
就像朱莉亚·拉维尼亚只会谈她想谈的事情:“我希望你哥哥能让我多派几个奴隶跟着他。我信不过那个安特罗波斯,万一有什么事他肯定第一个丢下你哥哥跑掉,你瞧着吧。”她笃定地说。
“诸神在上,马提乌斯是去当兵又不是去当少爷。”拉维尼奥没有磨伊先前嚷着该磨的剃刀,只是在脸颊边上刮下又一刀,也许比平时用力一点——想象伊在刮罪魁祸首马提乌斯。“你是信不过安特罗波斯?还是他信不过你?我看还是他不肯帮你当探子吧。”
“你哥哥用得上多几个人手,”朱莉亚·拉维尼亚说,“这样他要寄信回来的时候能指使人送信,还把回信带去。”
“多几个人他就得拿军饷养几个人吃饭。是您用得上多几个人手,您受不了掌控不了亲生儿子在哪罢了。”拉维尼奥没有停下手上的动作,三年过去伊对这件事渐渐熟练了,“幸好您还知道一个贴身女奴都不要派给我。”伊嘲讽道。
“他就是该多带几个人。”朱莉亚·拉维尼亚重复道,“就这么把我丢下了!”
拉维尼奥摔下剃刀,把布在水盆里浸湿拧干,擦一擦下巴和脖子,才转过脸去面对母亲。“您只看到您想看到的。”伊冷漠地说,开始往下巴上涂抹香膏,“连这剃刀都是马提乌斯送我的。假如他没有想到,您打算怎么办?”
“你是我女儿。”朱莉亚·拉维尼亚重复,她在一个非常确凿的梦境里,会让醒着的人怀疑自己才在做梦。
“如果您这样说的话。”拉维尼奥说,“我知道,盖乌斯·马提乌斯什么都比我强。我看您最好去全城的神庙走一圈每处都祭祀一遍,别管是埃及的神还是波斯的神,祈祝他平安回来。”伊最后一句话有些威胁的意思,“您还可以找西比尔祭司看看卦象。您看,我也算是宗教权威人士了。”维斯塔贞女再次转过身去面对镜子,开始分头发编规定发型的七根辫子,伊实在等不及回神庙值班了,然后晚上,再见到克里夫斯……
出人意料地,朱莉亚·拉维尼亚站起身来,走到拉维尼奥身后,理起伊波浪形的栗色长发,“缇利亚,我给你梳。”
拉维尼奥把手从头发上放下,耸起的肩膀随之垂下来。伊知道,这是又一次休战。
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